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Welcome to Rogers Digital Cable Box at City Hall

Posted by laurence on November 02nd 2005 to daily blogging, politics, urban issues

Many cities have been part of a increasingly disturbing trend of auctioning off naming rights to civic structures, plazas, fountains, parks, and other facilities in an attempt to make up for financial shortfalls in maintenance and construction. The most famous one lately in Toronto was the selling of Skydome to Rogers, who subsequently destroyed a part of city history by renaming it the Rogers Centre. I’m still waiting for them to fly above with a huge bucket of paint and splash the roof of the dome in their trademark red. Waiting, but not really looking forward to it. There were even some brief talks of adding corporate names to some subway stations to pay for their improvements. And now, there’s a report in The Star today that the city is mulling selling the naming rights of the city’s most important public plaza, Nathan Philips Square, to help finance its renovation.

LINK: Toronto Star: Renaming City Hall Square Mulled

I think it’d be fitting for the square to be renamed the Rogers Digital Cable Box. It is a square to begin with… and with a dash of black paint here, a large digital display at the front that shows the current time, and a few “children’s play areas” shaped like remote control and front control buttons, it would be a great architectural gem for the city. While we’re at it, how about Toronto Molson Canadian City Hall, complete with a large keg built on top of the council chamber ceiling? Or maybe Toronto Hemp Company High Park? It would help draw visitors from around the world coming to see the blight that is the city’s finances and the desperation it’s in to make ends meet. Think of the visitor dollars… then with the extra taxes from that, we can fund more public infrastructure to put more corporate names onto. It’d be the start of a great cycle towards prosperity, no? Brilliant idea!

Sarcasm aside, like I said, this is a disturbing trend. We want our cities to be great places, but we refuse to invest in them. People bitch and complain about the lack of subways in Toronto, but mention a large increase in taxes to fund them and you’ll find that people will be happy driving their cars through traffic or sticking with that slow bus. Any renaming of Nathan Philips Square would be setting a precedent for disaster and will mould the city into a giant billboard.

Find another way Toronto.

UPDATE, 2:44pm: I just thought of another possible renaming… what about the Trojan Condom CN Tower? We can put a giant condom over it and market it as a temperature controlled and super safe haven from bird flu!



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